2014, I am truly grateful for all the events that shaped me the person I am today. Someone once told me that lessons are meant to give you a huge impact in life, it is then when self-reflection takes place and you become stronger consciously. If lesson are easy to handle without emotions playing part in it, there aren't any use of the lesson but repetition of the mistake in different scenarios. Now, lets start my journey.
The beginning of year 2014 taught me to take things easy, "Hakuna Matata" was my motto. I knew somewhere in me that every problem I had was going to be alright and taken care of by the power of the universe. With this attitude I started my university first year first semester, I was so happy that I was finally going to study and get my degree so that I can work in the bank and be a successful career woman. I had a friend from my business law unit, S, she was my only friend I had in uni. But I had friends outside of school, mainly my dance institute friends. I started spending a lot of time with them, hanging out together and taking things too easy. This was my downfall! I started skipping lectures and tutorials just to be with him everyday, I spent my days either in his house or going out to parks. Middle of the year, things got rough between him and I, there were lots of arguments and misunderstandings that drove us apart till one day I stop talking to him. This event was a huge impact in my life, as I became depressed and emotionally detached to my surroundings. I lost all my hopes, trusts, feelings, dreams and etc. I was so angry with myself, constantly hating it to the very core. I see my reflection and get mad, violent thoughts flood my mind. My semester didn't go well, and I had to repeat all over again. At this point in my life, there was one thing I didn't lose but strengthen - my spiritual beliefs. I prayed, prayed so much to end this sufferings as it was eating me up slowly. This event taught me that overconfidence that everything is manageable without any input will give me no output. Also, I learnt that family is the only one that will be there end of the day to help with the struggles.
Semester two started with a hope of doing better and with the help of N my sister like friend and a book "The way of the peaceful warrior", I managed to get of the hole and breathe a fresher air. but of course these wouldn't have happen if I didn't put in effort and will power of my own to make things possible. A few weeks later, an amazing miracle or more like a gift sent to me from God came into my life- SL my love. It is astonishing that we connected so quick, I liked his personality, his characteristics and also his physique. We spent time together, mostly dinners then I was to go home and study or rest. With the SFOL performance, studies were lagging and I had assignments due during the show. Somehow I got things done, and once the show was over I was dedicated to my studies as I don't want to repeat my mistakes again. Exams came soon, I spent time with my new friend M, who was and is amazing in his own ways, we studied together and talked deep meaningful conversations that went on for hours. Once semester was over I spent my days with work, my boyfriend and the few friends I have. Towards the end of the year, I was glad with things I have done the second half of the year. I learnt that certain friendship is worth holding onto, and that things happens for a reason and that reason is always for the better.
P.S. I would like to personally thank the people who was there for me - my family, N, M and not forgetting SL. Words are limited to what I feel for you all.